A Love Fortunate Lulu

So one day I’m at an event focusing on the environment that a dear friend is sponsoring and everyone there is an activist of sorts for the environment and changing the world.  I often, but not always, find that activist people that want to create change through activism have a tendency to use fear and an intensity that I find to be a turn off (and this is coming from a pretty intense person). I feel they are often using the same negative tactics, similar to greed and control, to create a positive change.  That just feels oxymoronic to me.  Some may say that at least the change happened, but I don’t personally find it motivating and I don’t believe that changes that come from fear will stick because something else can scare the person and make them shift again. And since that is my truth and I planned on sticking to it, I state outright to the group that I am a devout NON-activist and share, blah, blah, blah...  After my friends comes up to me and says what the hell were you talking about, your a love activist.  I smirk and I say, I guess your right I am.  Well that took the air out of my tires but made my heart sing a little louder.  I’m a big fan of love in almost all of it’s flavors mostly the unconditional kind as I find it to be the single most transformative force there is in the world. 

I say unconditional because it helps to be unattached to the outcome, but don’t worry there is always a law of cause and effect principle that makes you become a magnet for love and other fucking fabulous treats in your life.  Excuse my language but I think of the word fuck to be like MSG, it’s a flavor enhancer and may be prone to excessive use of the word.  But for the rest of this blog, I’ll call it an FFT.  

The buddhists say that attachment leads to suffering and this may not be the buddhist reasoning but I get it because if things change, and, trust me, according to the law of nature, they will, then it’s gone or changed.  But change doesn’t mean something has to go downhill, it could be better and actually be an FFT.  And a loss may actually bring you freedom but I’m digressing.  So the Lulu reason for non-attachment is that your image my be too limiting that you couldn’t have even imagined how supercalifragilisticexpialidocious of a manifestation you may find.  And if your looking for the smaller less fabulous treat, you’ll miss the cracker jack surprise.  And also the MOSTEST important other reason I act lovingly is because it feels great.  Sometimes I think I can feel my heart smiling.  Truly I do and when the corned of my heart turn up in delight, it just tickles from the inside out.  I’ve also learned to accept that not everyone you love can appreciate the love as it happens.  So if I’m attached to someone returning it directly, I may be disappointed.  And as I’ve learned in life, I can give in one place and then I receive unexpectedly in another.  Our muggle perspective is too small and in truth we’re all connected.  So although it may appear to be coming from a totally different person or instance, it’s not. In truth, since we’re all connected a little further from the epicenter of the love quake on the universal love fascia. Hope I didn’t lose you on that last one.  

The universe is huge so the ripples of cause and effect that your particular love expression incident my be riding, may be having an impact on the moons of jupiter.  Oh those lucky aliens on jupiter.  OK I’m being dramatic, but you get the picture.  And heck if I was attached to being a NON-activist, I wouldn’t have declared myself a love activist and may not have owned it in a way that has lead me to write this blog or throw love letter writing parties.  So experiences like that is what leads me to trust.  As they say those that are hardest to love are those that need it the most.  So I can also think of it as charity, but to be honest that feels arrogant.  However, I do trust that just because a person isn’t receptive or acknowledge it in the moment, it doesn’t mean that your expression of love can’t be like a time release capsule that has a delayed effect.  And if I want to reach jupiter, I have to own that because of the limitations or time and space that may take a while or if the person I’m giving love to has so many walls or negative thought patterns, my love incident may have to do a little extra navigating and work circuitously to have an impact.  Or maybe it’s a time bomb that explodes there heart open in a way that makes them orgasm or practically orgasm from the ecstasy of it all.  I’ve had experiences like that and it wasn’t sexual love, it was the unconditional kind but it left me practically screaming OMG!!!

And this leads me to the love fortune of the day and how my new love fortune blog commitment .  But one more word about attachment.  When I decided to go to Soul Cycle, my intension was exercise with an attachment to getting in shape and feeling healthier and happier.  First I knew that meant I’d probably lose weight but because I never weighed myself, I don’t know how much I lost, I never imagine what you see below which is a picture of me in October of 2011 just a month or two before I started at Soul (and made other changes) and last night.  

October 2011

Feb 2013

I also believe that if I were attached to the number of pounds I would have gotten into the numbers frustration game and not gotten to where I feel like my body and my Soul are now in sync.  And have I told you I’m pretty much ridiculously happy.  And if I weren’t open to limitless possibilities, I never would be surrounded by people that make me humble in my ability to be loving and thoughtful.  I never expected that I would meet a group of more outstandingly loving and creative people in my life.  So what started as exercise turned into a loving community.  Talk about an FFT.  I would just show up and be Lulu and the people that have become my Soul Family (too many too name and I don’t want to leave anyone out) have improved the quality of my life in a way that is better for my heart than lowering my cholesterol would be.  

So on my 48th birthday, my Soul family spared nothing in making me feel like the luckiest Lulu in the galaxy.  And although the day was truly a cornucopia of so very many precious moments and actual gifts that I received, I have to tell you about one because this is what has gotten me to to commit to blogging, which I’ve been wanting to do, but my inner judgement voice kept telling me that you don’t have anything that interesting to share or hasn’t been shared before by people far more expert or entertaining than you.  Oh don’t fool yourself just because I’ve declared myself the person that puts woo hoo into woo woo, I have my share of negative thought patterns.  And that still may be true, but they don’t share it like I would so.  I’m turning up my nose and sticking my tongue out to that negative voice.

See I told you I digress.  So the gift I referenced was from Austin Bone and Danny Kopel is a box of 365 love fortunes.  

So this is what 365 Love Fortunes Look Like

Yes they gave me a box of 365 reasons of why they love me.  Crazy, huh, I’m truly humbled by this gift.   After all, I would be hard pressed to think of 365 lovable things about me and as I go through this process, I may think that Austin and Danny were doing some really good drugs or were talking about another Lulu when they wrote that love fortune.  I mostly plan on blogging about the love fortunes I receive and how they play out in me and as I chose to share the actual fortunes.  But since I’ve recently started hosting Love Letter Writing Parties, you never know where this will lead.  I will be very honest on my process as I believe that I am a work in progress that has so much room for improvement on being loving.  I’m no saint nor do I want to be one.  That being said, I've definitely attracted a lot of loving people,  so I may be on the right track after all.  So through these blogs I plan on sharing from my heart and that includes the cracks as well and I will not pretend to be a Stepford optimist. Mostly I'll share from my experiences.  After all one of my favorite quotes from one of my teacher is, "Would you rather hear from someone that says this is my experience or this is my believe.  After all you know what a belief system is, BS?"

I digressed again.  Back to the gift...  To honor non-attachment and one of my mottos in that we own nothing and are just care takers until someone else can benefit, they recommend I share them.  So I can pass on these love fortunes to unsuspecting strangers, work associates, friends or all of you through these blogs.  And I wish I could say that the recommendation to do a blog for each fortune cookie came from Rachel Schwab, she is so insightful considering I didn’t even tell her that in my annual birthday tarot reading we discussed me doing some writing.  

I did start picking fortunes yesterday so I’m a day behind on the blogging already.  But since todays love fortune is “I love how unconditionally loving you are.”  I think I covered that effusively above.  And I don’t want to lose you and have you feeling like your reading the unabridged version of War and Peace, I’m going to cut it short.  Besides I just want to relish in how love fortunate I feel.  So I’m going to comment on fortune number at another time.  Oh did I tell you that I think linear time is too limiting so we’ll see how this blog thing goes and please provide feedback...I feel passionate about sharing and want to hear as well as spout my Lulu-isms.

A LOVE FORTUNATE LULU!!!!