Can't Make This Sh@#! Up

Well that's my motto because synchronicities arise every where.  You lucky, today has been a roller coaster of a day and fortunately the highs outweighed the old so I'm leaving it simple...   I happened to be sharing a story with someone about work about being a cheerleader for a friend...to which she replied through a bathroom stall (probably too much information), you know one of the reasons I love you is because your so encouraging...to which I replied, how did you know that was todays love fortune.  Truth it was.  See here it is

Happiness is only real when shared...

So this quote, "Happiness is only real when shared."  Was inspired by the movie and book Into The Wild.  I recommend them both.  It's about a young man's exploration of his independence on journey the people he meets and he's time in the wild.  Don't want to give too much away.  But sharing this quote was inspired by todays Love Fortune, I Love Being Part of Your Life.

It's true, even when an event happens alone, when I share it through story or photo with someone who "gets it" it becomes more real.  Even though I can debate you on what real really is or not but let's not go there.  Sharing is fun.  And if any of you know Robert Fulghum's, All I Really Need to Know I Learned in Kindergarden, number one is share everything.  I guess some people are horders but I do like to give literally and metaphorically.  And if you not aware here are the things he learned in kindergarden and I may comment in blue (may as if I can resist adding a Lului-sm or...)

1. Share everything.  Enough said above...besides we don't own it.
2. Play fair. If you don't play fair, you don't really win - right.  
3. Don't hit people.  Not unless you want to be hit back, and I'm a lover not a fighter
4. Put thngs back where you found them. 
5. CLEAN UP YOUR OWN MESS.  My friend Nina used to refer to this as changing our own diapers.  We often used this in reference to drama queens who love to spray their drama aka shit on others.  Adults need to change their own diapers.
6. Don't take things that aren't yours.  Duh!
7. Say you're SORRY when you HURT somebody.  I do think you need to say your sorry for sure.  It's kind of like change your diapers but because we can't control someones reaction I think we stop at the apology.  Some people go on and on about feeling bad and being sorry, which I think they believe makes them a better person.  However what they are doing is dumping their guilt, then leaves the person who was offended owning their guilt while still dealing with their feelings about the offense and that's not fair.  It's almost like adding insult to injury.
8. Wash your hands before you eat.
9. Flush.
10. Warm cookies and cold milk are good for you.  Well maybe for your soul but have to say this sugar free gluten free vegan may disagree on this one.  But it's the metaphor that's important...find the combination of warm and cold and nurturing...
11. Live a balanced life - learn some and drink some and draw some and paint some and sing and dance and play and work everyday some.  Balance isn't 50/50...and what is balance for me is not for you...and what is balance today for me, may not be tomorrow, it's a constant process.  I remember hearing that planes before they talk off have to submit their travel route.  And they are truly on the exact route less than 10% of the time.  The rest of the time is going off the path, realizing your off the path and then steering yourself back on...
12. Take a nap every afternoon.  I love me a nap and I rationalize this one as time for my unconscious to work out all my shit in dream time so I don't have to...well that and the body restores itself.  It doesn't have to be long.
13. When you go out into the world, watch out for traffic, hold hands, and stick together.  This warms my heart...people you can count on are precious...don't ya think.
14. Be aware of wonder. Remember the little seed in the Stryrofoam cup: The roots go down and the plant goes up and nobody really knows how or why, but we are all like that.  Awe is a good thing and that comes from facing everything like it's new...helps you stay young.  There are certain things in my life that even though I know it's supposed to work out that way, I'm still amazed when it does.  I like being amazed.
15. Goldfish and hamster and white mice and even the little seed in the Styrofoam cup - they all die. So do we.  Well the only constant is change...and I can really get all woo woo on your asses and say nothing dies, it just changes form...beside we're not really form anyway.  If you want to discuss this more, let's go for a glass of wine...maybe a bottle.
16. And then remember the Dick-and-Jane books and the first workd you learned - the biggest word of all - LOOK.” Looking is more important than Talking so on that note...Sweet Dreams.

What A Coinky Dink!!!

So what a coincidence that I would buy this card, last night, just because I liked it and would figure out who gets it later (For the record, I have a card purchasing habit)

(oops and it's hard to read so I'll repeat.  "To Laugh Often and Much, to appreciate beauty, to find the best in others, to leave the world a bit better...this is the ideal life."

And this morning my love fortune is "I love your unending laughter."  Well that made me laugh so it may not end but there are gaps at times but on the whole there is nothing I like more.  I like to find humor in all of life not just stand up routines.  It moves chi...unlike crying (which is another release of energy and I am not judging), it energizes.  I've never felt exhausted after a good laugh.  There is someone who I can't recall right now who used it to heal from a serious immune deficiency.  He actually got tons of the three Stooges.  Not my preference but let's face it there are lots of flavors of humor.  Plus I definitely think it's good for the abs.  I happen to have a resonanat laugh...it's heard through halls and corridors...it's not that I try to laugh loudly, I just laugh freely and that comes straight from the belly.  I am definitely not a tee hee or tittering type laughter but if that's your style do it.  Why be pissy when you can be laughing - I don't get the joy in the pissy.  I actually have lots more on laughter, but I'm going to honor that I was spinning by 6 AM this morning and it's been a full day.  But I bet laughter will come up again and again, it's a favorite topic of mine.  And really I could have just left you with the card quote because it is my motto even though I didn't come up with it.  I love to laugh...oh on that note does everyone remember this Mary Poppins Tune (come on you can't NOT laugh when you listen to this)

When Your Grateful Life is Great & When You Share It, It's Supercalifragilisticexpialidocious

OK I said, I'd comment every day on fortune of day...today I'm kind of double dipping because I started late and feeling a little tired but have to say when I read this one, I felt a little like Sally Fields but instead of they like me, they really like me...I felt like, they see me, they really see me!!!  Oh wait I forgot to remind you of the fortune.  This love fortune is they love me because I am genuinely generous.  And I have to say as a person who spent most of her youth trying to pretend to be what others expected to me, I find the genuine part really refreshing.  Actually when I was younger I thought others looked happier than me so if I pretended to be like them (fake it until you make it), I too would be happy.  Guess what that didn't work.

Sowly but surely with a lot of personal introspection and reflection, I worked my ass off at shedding the masks I was wearing.  And as part of the introspection and reflection, I took a lot of woo woo spiritual classes.   In those classes, I found that some people that were all gooey and sweet, which felt incredibly disingenuous to me.  However, everyone else seemed to like them.  To be honest those people gave me a tooth ache and almost put me into diabetic shock.  But I was scared that others would not like my tarter and spicier version of spirituality which in the end was far more honest.  So I'm glad that my genuineness is appreciated.

I also don't believe in telling people things that I don't believe to be true.  I also don't believe in casting pearls before swine, so I won't be overly effusive if I know the walls are to thick to penetrate.  So I am discerning but I know that people don't express their gratitude and appreciation for all the gifts we receive frequently enough.  And to quote, Jill Taylor Bolton who wrote the amazing book, Stroke of Insight, when your grateful life is great.  That is true but I believe it takes one more step. you need to be not only grateful you need to express it.  When you express it, it is exponentiate the cause and effect impact of your gratitude out into the universe which provides the reciprocity.  And in expressing it your being generous to those that you are grateful for and it doesn't even cost you anything.  Last I heard words were free.  Personally I do like buying people gifts that make me think of them because it just feels good but a compliment or sharing an insight is priceless to the recipient.  Plus, we assume that people know how we feel but most of us our not mind readers.  You know what they say about assumptions...and I think more people see themselves differently than others so when you share your appreciation it's generally more appreciated than not.  Take it from a person who has 355 love fortunes (any many other loving bday cards)/

And this morning I said I would be with this intention.  Just so happens I headed to card store to make sure I am able to express that gratitude to my birthday guests who rocked my world in the love that they shared.  So before heading home I met some friends for dinner.  I had to go through Grand Central.  The Heart Art and they sell these hearts.

Felt in sync with the loving life theme but after taking this picture, I found this one

You can't read it too clearly but it says Gratitude, our theme.  Would have been a real mind fuck if it said genuine gratitude but pretty damn close and there is nothing wrong with faking it until you make it since after all practice makes perfect.

Unconditional Love does Not Mean Unconditional Like

Like I said in yesterdays blog...I don't know how things are going to go.  And as I was laying in bed wondering how close it was for the alarm to go off, I thought, oh shit, I forgot to comment yesterday that unconditional love does not mean unconditional like.  Like is about preference and flavors.  Love to me is more like a generous spirit, being kind, being present with the people you are interacting with...it is expressed more by the tone in your voice than the words I love you.  Unconditional love because your not attached to outcome also isn't about being in love or loving someone or something.  Loving someone is just a 10 on the like scale just like hating something is on 0 (zero) and of the scale and that is based on our preferences for the flavors things come in.  Some people like things tart or spicy or sweet...some like things simple some like their food nutty and fruity...a flavor can't be wrong it's just preference right.

I also woke up thinking, oh shit, I should have also dedicated this blog to my friend Alyce Santoro. Here is a link to her blog and her website.   I don't know why I left her anonymous as she is the one who lovingly pointed out that I am a love activist.  She is a creative genius and creator of that sonic fabric dress that I put in that Feb. 2013 photo on yesterdays blog.  Yes it was made with cassette tapes in the weave.  I had to different colors, purple had the sounds or NYC while the black had the sacred Om.  And she was generous enough to pass along Julio her designer friend to make the dress.  Heck it's a great dress so here it is again, but this time with a mutual friend of Alyce and I, Tom.

Have I mentioned that I digress.  Well she had an exhibit in NYC in early January.  And one of the ways I like to be loving is to share creative genius when I can.  So I told many friends about the exhibit so Alyce would have standing room only (ok also prone to exaggeration to, it was an exhibit not a performance - everyone was standing) and they could benefit from creative genius.  One of my friends, Llorraine Niethardt, another creative genius, showed up.  (So here is her website and check out her Venus Unplugged blog talk radio and her handmade shoes and her...did I say genius...) She and I went out for a drink and The World Needs More Love Letters (I still need to get to work, but this is also genius and I think the most important thing any of us can do...get out of our own shit and give some loving support anonymously to a stranger...so for now check out the link and this TED video on the founder) and the idea to throw unconditional love letter parties was inspired through that.  So if your read yesterdays blog, you know how I was talking about the ripples of love...can you see what I mean...it's like the shampoo commercial that says and you tell two friends and they tell two friends and so on and so on....

And since I'm anxious to read my next fortune of the day I don't want to wait to long to comment on the very first love fortune which is "I love how sentimental you can get."  I have to admit my negative voices often here sappy when I here sentimental because I was a crier when I was a kid.  Hell I still am but when I was a kid it came from fear and sadness...now I cry when I'm happy, I even cry when I'm angry (actually I warn you if that happens it means I'm irate and I've realized that I'm crying because either because the intensity of my rage is scaring me or it's my bodies way of putting a putting water on the fire like a fire hydrant), I cry when I'm touched...now I find it empowering before I had shame.  So I guess it's ok to be sappy but the fortune said sentimental.  So I'm going to consult Webste's yet again, and that dictionary says a : marked or governed by feeling, sensibility, or emotional idealism.  I like being a love idealist and love is an emotion...well really a state of being and another e-dictionary says, 1. Of or prompted by feelings of tenderness, sadness, or nostalgia: "she felt a sentimental attachment to the place creep over her".  So I guess for me sentimental is what I used to have shame over and now am empowered.  Life really is about turning lemons into lemonade...

Oh and drum roll please...the fortune for today is "I Love that You that you are always genuinely gracious."  So I'm going to be with this with one through out the day and see what arises...more to blog tonight!!!

A Love Fortunate Lulu

So one day I’m at an event focusing on the environment that a dear friend is sponsoring and everyone there is an activist of sorts for the environment and changing the world.  I often, but not always, find that activist people that want to create change through activism have a tendency to use fear and an intensity that I find to be a turn off (and this is coming from a pretty intense person). I feel they are often using the same negative tactics, similar to greed and control, to create a positive change.  That just feels oxymoronic to me.  Some may say that at least the change happened, but I don’t personally find it motivating and I don’t believe that changes that come from fear will stick because something else can scare the person and make them shift again. And since that is my truth and I planned on sticking to it, I state outright to the group that I am a devout NON-activist and share, blah, blah, blah...  After my friends comes up to me and says what the hell were you talking about, your a love activist.  I smirk and I say, I guess your right I am.  Well that took the air out of my tires but made my heart sing a little louder.  I’m a big fan of love in almost all of it’s flavors mostly the unconditional kind as I find it to be the single most transformative force there is in the world. 

I say unconditional because it helps to be unattached to the outcome, but don’t worry there is always a law of cause and effect principle that makes you become a magnet for love and other fucking fabulous treats in your life.  Excuse my language but I think of the word fuck to be like MSG, it’s a flavor enhancer and may be prone to excessive use of the word.  But for the rest of this blog, I’ll call it an FFT.  

The buddhists say that attachment leads to suffering and this may not be the buddhist reasoning but I get it because if things change, and, trust me, according to the law of nature, they will, then it’s gone or changed.  But change doesn’t mean something has to go downhill, it could be better and actually be an FFT.  And a loss may actually bring you freedom but I’m digressing.  So the Lulu reason for non-attachment is that your image my be too limiting that you couldn’t have even imagined how supercalifragilisticexpialidocious of a manifestation you may find.  And if your looking for the smaller less fabulous treat, you’ll miss the cracker jack surprise.  And also the MOSTEST important other reason I act lovingly is because it feels great.  Sometimes I think I can feel my heart smiling.  Truly I do and when the corned of my heart turn up in delight, it just tickles from the inside out.  I’ve also learned to accept that not everyone you love can appreciate the love as it happens.  So if I’m attached to someone returning it directly, I may be disappointed.  And as I’ve learned in life, I can give in one place and then I receive unexpectedly in another.  Our muggle perspective is too small and in truth we’re all connected.  So although it may appear to be coming from a totally different person or instance, it’s not. In truth, since we’re all connected a little further from the epicenter of the love quake on the universal love fascia. Hope I didn’t lose you on that last one.  

The universe is huge so the ripples of cause and effect that your particular love expression incident my be riding, may be having an impact on the moons of jupiter.  Oh those lucky aliens on jupiter.  OK I’m being dramatic, but you get the picture.  And heck if I was attached to being a NON-activist, I wouldn’t have declared myself a love activist and may not have owned it in a way that has lead me to write this blog or throw love letter writing parties.  So experiences like that is what leads me to trust.  As they say those that are hardest to love are those that need it the most.  So I can also think of it as charity, but to be honest that feels arrogant.  However, I do trust that just because a person isn’t receptive or acknowledge it in the moment, it doesn’t mean that your expression of love can’t be like a time release capsule that has a delayed effect.  And if I want to reach jupiter, I have to own that because of the limitations or time and space that may take a while or if the person I’m giving love to has so many walls or negative thought patterns, my love incident may have to do a little extra navigating and work circuitously to have an impact.  Or maybe it’s a time bomb that explodes there heart open in a way that makes them orgasm or practically orgasm from the ecstasy of it all.  I’ve had experiences like that and it wasn’t sexual love, it was the unconditional kind but it left me practically screaming OMG!!!

And this leads me to the love fortune of the day and how my new love fortune blog commitment .  But one more word about attachment.  When I decided to go to Soul Cycle, my intension was exercise with an attachment to getting in shape and feeling healthier and happier.  First I knew that meant I’d probably lose weight but because I never weighed myself, I don’t know how much I lost, I never imagine what you see below which is a picture of me in October of 2011 just a month or two before I started at Soul (and made other changes) and last night.  

October 2011

Feb 2013

I also believe that if I were attached to the number of pounds I would have gotten into the numbers frustration game and not gotten to where I feel like my body and my Soul are now in sync.  And have I told you I’m pretty much ridiculously happy.  And if I weren’t open to limitless possibilities, I never would be surrounded by people that make me humble in my ability to be loving and thoughtful.  I never expected that I would meet a group of more outstandingly loving and creative people in my life.  So what started as exercise turned into a loving community.  Talk about an FFT.  I would just show up and be Lulu and the people that have become my Soul Family (too many too name and I don’t want to leave anyone out) have improved the quality of my life in a way that is better for my heart than lowering my cholesterol would be.  

So on my 48th birthday, my Soul family spared nothing in making me feel like the luckiest Lulu in the galaxy.  And although the day was truly a cornucopia of so very many precious moments and actual gifts that I received, I have to tell you about one because this is what has gotten me to to commit to blogging, which I’ve been wanting to do, but my inner judgement voice kept telling me that you don’t have anything that interesting to share or hasn’t been shared before by people far more expert or entertaining than you.  Oh don’t fool yourself just because I’ve declared myself the person that puts woo hoo into woo woo, I have my share of negative thought patterns.  And that still may be true, but they don’t share it like I would so.  I’m turning up my nose and sticking my tongue out to that negative voice.

See I told you I digress.  So the gift I referenced was from Austin Bone and Danny Kopel is a box of 365 love fortunes.  

So this is what 365 Love Fortunes Look Like

Yes they gave me a box of 365 reasons of why they love me.  Crazy, huh, I’m truly humbled by this gift.   After all, I would be hard pressed to think of 365 lovable things about me and as I go through this process, I may think that Austin and Danny were doing some really good drugs or were talking about another Lulu when they wrote that love fortune.  I mostly plan on blogging about the love fortunes I receive and how they play out in me and as I chose to share the actual fortunes.  But since I’ve recently started hosting Love Letter Writing Parties, you never know where this will lead.  I will be very honest on my process as I believe that I am a work in progress that has so much room for improvement on being loving.  I’m no saint nor do I want to be one.  That being said, I've definitely attracted a lot of loving people,  so I may be on the right track after all.  So through these blogs I plan on sharing from my heart and that includes the cracks as well and I will not pretend to be a Stepford optimist. Mostly I'll share from my experiences.  After all one of my favorite quotes from one of my teacher is, "Would you rather hear from someone that says this is my experience or this is my believe.  After all you know what a belief system is, BS?"

I digressed again.  Back to the gift...  To honor non-attachment and one of my mottos in that we own nothing and are just care takers until someone else can benefit, they recommend I share them.  So I can pass on these love fortunes to unsuspecting strangers, work associates, friends or all of you through these blogs.  And I wish I could say that the recommendation to do a blog for each fortune cookie came from Rachel Schwab, she is so insightful considering I didn’t even tell her that in my annual birthday tarot reading we discussed me doing some writing.  

I did start picking fortunes yesterday so I’m a day behind on the blogging already.  But since todays love fortune is “I love how unconditionally loving you are.”  I think I covered that effusively above.  And I don’t want to lose you and have you feeling like your reading the unabridged version of War and Peace, I’m going to cut it short.  Besides I just want to relish in how love fortunate I feel.  So I’m going to comment on fortune number at another time.  Oh did I tell you that I think linear time is too limiting so we’ll see how this blog thing goes and please provide feedback...I feel passionate about sharing and want to hear as well as spout my Lulu-isms.

A LOVE FORTUNATE LULU!!!!